Thursday, March 17, 2011

The Ring

One of the things that bothered me was my wedding ring.  I felt foolish wearing it and I felt foolish at the thought of taking it off.  There should be a book, Rules of Widowhood.  I had no idea what to do.  I didn’t feel married, that’s for sure but I also didn’t want people to look at it as if I were casting Rick off.  In the end I think I waited about four months.  I guess it was ridiculous to worry about what anyone else thought.  It was funny that even though the ring was off my finger the impression on my skin was still there; it didn’t disappear for a long time.

I am not superstitious but I come from a long line of superstitious people.  All four of my grandparents were from Ireland and they were very superstitious.  Nanny, my father’s mom used to scare the daylights out of me with her stories and superstitions.

My brother, Tom and I were both married in the same year, 1984.  My mom offered Tom my father’s (Jimmy’s) wedding ring and she offered me her wedding ring.  It was a beautiful 24kt. yellow gold band with a milgrain edge.  It was a lovely gesture to pass the rings on in the family.  I actually plan to do the same thing some day.  We bought Rick a new matching ring.

When Rick died I did have the thought of the cursed wedding ring go through my mind, cursed because both of our husbands had died and perhaps my mother’s ring held the curse.   I know, kind of silly but at the same time, my grandmother probably would have thought of it and said it too.  I know that I’m not cursed and the ring wasn’t cursed but I do have an active imagination,


  1. Such a beautiful story. Thank you for sharing.



  2. You and Rick had a wonderful marriage. Your rings are blessed. Having a loving marriage is a blessing!

    What do we say about rings that were given to a woman that ends up divorced?